Thursday, September 27, 2012

Playing the Game

In my latest book, Breaking You in the World of I, there are thoughts I share in regard to the games we're here as humans to play. Now, mind you, I'm not talking about board games like Monopoly, but just the same, a game is a game.

The game I'm talking about in my book is the fact that we're here to experience this realm of existence. Everything you can imagine or have a desire to experience is here for you and you alone. Sure, there may be other Beings that see a game being played and decide that, they too, would cherish the experience. For instance: Bungee Jumping is an experience I have yet to explore. I have jumped from perfectly good airplanes, but never from a very sound bridge (as if one exists in the U.S.). This is a game though proven safe, still conjures thoughts of escaping death...the biggest game in this realm.

What game are you here to play and how is that game going? Are you winning at your game? Well, let me say that by the shear fact that you're not dead, you are still in the game. Then again, who knows if the next realm isn't the game you're striving to get to...kind of like a Mario Brothers game of levels.

This Sunday I needed to get out of the house for just a few hours. I'd been working all week and though I usually head down to a favorite watering hole on Fridays, to socialize with some friends, lately, I've decided to put more time into my game and cut out the extras. Now, all work and no play doesn't just make Jeffry a dull boy, it also throws him off balance for a bit.

See, my game, for me, the one I've decided to play, is to really get to the nitty gritty of why we humans do the things we do. I sat in my car, overlooking the ocean and contemplated the answers to my questions; what makes a confort zone and what changes one's disciplines? Or in other words; what is the make-up of the comfort zone and the inability of one to really police themselves; to be disciplined?

Of course, anyone could say that it's one's desires that make them comfortable in their life or allows them to be disciplined, but I find that's not really the case. After drawing a line across a sheet of paper and marking it as 0 (zero) and then realizing that we are all vibrating (waves) going up and down across the 0, then we are always in a positive or negative state of existence. Though this may not be anything new to some, that we are +/- vibrational waves 24/7/365, the fact that most people's 0 rarely changes and they remain in their "comfort zone" which is often a struggling zone, is very important. Why? Because it means that one is not winning what they are here to play...their game.  It also means that mankind is not winning, therefore, we expand at an extremely slow rate; continuing with wars and other mid-evil ideas that rob us of our intelligence.

Of course, one could argue that a person is here to intentionally lose at the game of life so they could experience what it is like, but if that were true, then why not just go lay down in a gutter somewhere and die. Why? Because it's not true! People don't come to this realm to play a game where they are going to lose. The lottery wouldn't be so popular if that were the case.

So, there's more to my thoughts than meet the eye. If our comfort zone is at 0, and we do everything we can to stay close to that 0, then the game one is playing is prolonged and accepted as a struggle. Mind you, and just for noteworthy sake, the comfort zone is not about money; wealthy and poor alike, stay in a comfort zone.

Imagine on this wavelength scale that when the wave goes to the top, point A (+100) you are reaching happiness. When it is at the bottom (-100) one is regretful of their actions. Then, the wave begins to move upward again back to the 0. As an example:

I'm sitting at my desk and working away for hours on end. I'm doing what a Being is supposed to do; I'm creating. Slowly, I'm working my way up the wave because creating is a positive. When I get to my peak, Point A(+100), I take a break from what I am doing and step away from my work. Maybe I go online and visit FB or I text some friends, or play a game of solitaire. All of these actions are going to lead me down the wave to Point B (-100) When I'm done wasting my time, I think to myself, "Man! I need to get back to work and create." I head back up the wave to 0. Now, along the way, I'm thinking to myself about all the wasted time and, "Why am I so undisciplined?" The answer-- I had to be. There is a balance going on that suggests in your mind that you must stay in the comfort zone and by allowing yourself to wane from your creativity/creative side or objective, you will remain safe in your comfort zone. The amount of time between Point A and Point B is the amount of measurable discipline we have. 

To the Being, Point A equals happiness and Point B is unhappiness. There is not a good or bad thing about either of these, they are actually polar and assist in our balance; kind of like a pendulum that keeps the center ball in check. 

Now, if one wants to change their comfort zone, they need to understand what it is they believe is making them happy. As an example: A smoker may need to light up every 30 minutes. He is reaching for something that releases serotonin and relaxes the nerves while, at the same time, giving a small sense of euphoria; a sense of happiness. If the smoker were to want to quit smoking, then he would no longer experience the serotonin release and, unless he replaced Point A with something substantial, his vibration is going to change and he is going to leave point A rather quickly, as if jumping off of a cliff. This smoker is now going to crash into Point B with an attitude of being unhappy and leave Point B twice as unhappy. Still this is nothing new, right? We all know smokers get edgy when trying to quit. But wait! There''s more!

From a personal example, when I write, I used to always have a soda next to me. Kind of like one's coffee; it opens neuron pathways that allow you to create. But, does it really? I was very creative long before I used soda in a habitual form. I eventually allowed myself to believe that the soda was happiness and I built a belief around it. I needed to build this belief so while I was at my 0, I would have something to go for that I could eventually bounce back off of at Point B; my FB, texting, solitaire...     

Playing the game is simple, we do it all day and every day. Winning the game is a little more difficult because it means you must change your zero; your comfort zone. If you can measure it, it can be easily recognized when you're falling back to zero. Though it's okay to move up and down the wave scale, if you want real change and you want to win whatever game you're playing, you must move from the lower end of the zero or -100 back up to the +100 as quickly as possible. Winners often move at breakneck speeds.   

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

The Secret to the "Secret"

Okay, this term has got to stop. Is anyone else out there in our universe tired of "the secret" to this or that? Really, hear me out. There are no secrets!

Yes, things may seem like a mystery, but in reality, if you don't know something, then all the "secret" is, is personally undiscovered information. No one is intentionally hiding something from you the torturous way your siblings did when you were just children. You just haven't thought things through enough on your own to get to point B, the secret.

As an example: There is no "secret" to getting more clientele for one's business. If you want more business, then outflow more communication. If you have too much business and want less, then don't communicate to anyone, or turn them away as they show up. So the "secret" to anything is...if you want it in your life, then reach for it.

It seems that every email I get where someone is trying to sell something, it holds a "secret" that is now available only through them, because they know the secret and you don't. My sister once beat me up because I had a secret. LOL Of course, I'm much bigger than her now, so I can keep all the secrets I want.

All I'm asking is that we move away from the "secret" and label our titles to the truth of the content we will provide. Example: Do you need to know how to _____? Then tune in to today's webinar... See how easy that is. Don't try to trick me into information you think you have over me. I may already know it and am not presently using it to my advantage. First off, by claiming it's a "secret" and then it turns out that I came to your article or webinar and set my own schedule back just to read or hear info I already've wasted my time. Score one minus point for you. A few points too many and I will completely tune you out.

Human beings are smarter than they have been taught to believe. If you want their attention then let them know what you are sharing and what skills you have that can help them attain their needs or desires. Really, we are all adults, aren't we? I'm more apt to read an article of, My Hypothetical View of Creationism, to, The Secret of Evolution. One tells me directly that someone has another point of view or possibility for my existence.

Calling anything these days, "the Secret" is like having a phone and never using it for anything but texting. It seems like people have forgotten how to deal with life head on. How to communicate in directness, hmm, perhaps that's the secret!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Being a Sovereign Citizen is not a Crime

I have been reading articles about Sovereign citizens being under the watchful eye of the FBI. There were 10 crimes committed by "Sovereigns" in 2010 and a total of 18 to date in 2012. There were more than 5000 arrests with the OWS movement. There are so many "laws" being passed in the name of "security" that with each passing day, more and more individual rights are taken away. "Real" sovereign citizens aren't out to harm anyone as the FBI would like people to believe. Take a moment to read this article by Ayn Rand who wrote it in the 1940s, but it seems as though she was speaking about the world as we know it today. 

Ayn Rand...

The greatest threat to mankind and civilization is the spread of the totalitarian philosophy. Its best ally is not the devotion of its followers but the confusion of its enemies. To fight it, we must understand it.
Totalitarianism is collectivism. Collectivism means the subjugation of the individual to a group — whether to a race, class or state does not matter. Collectivism holds that man must be chained to collective action and collective thought for the sake of what is called “the common good.´´
Throughout history, no tyrant ever rose to power except on the claim of representing “the common good.´´ Napoleon “served the common good´´ of France. Hitler is “serving the common good´´ of Germany. Horrors which no man would dare consider for his own selfish sake are perpetrated with a clear conscience by “altruists´´ who justify themselves by-the common good.
No tyrant has ever lasted long by force of arms alone. Men have been enslaved primarily by spiritual weapons. And the greatest of these is the collectivist doctrine that the supremacy of the state over the individual constitutes the common good. No dictator could rise if men held as a sacred faith the conviction that they have inalienable rights of which they cannot be deprived for any cause whatsoever, by any man whatsoever, neither by evildoer nor supposed benefactor.
This is the basic tenet of individualism, as opposed to collectivism. Individualism holds that man is an independent entity with an inalienable right to the pursuit of his own happiness in a society where men deal with one another as equals.
The American system is founded on individualism. If it is to survive, we must understand the principles of individualism and hold them as our standard in any public question, in every issue we face. We must have a positive credo, a clear consistent faith.
We must learn to reject as total evil the conception that the common good is served by the abolition of individual rights. General happiness cannot be created out of general suffering and self-immolation. The only happy society is one of happy individuals. One cannot have a healthy forest made up of rotten trees.
The power of society must always be limited by the basic, inalienable rights of the individual.
The right of liberty means man’s right to individual action, individual choice, individual initiative and individual property. Without the right to private property no independent action is possible.
The right to the pursuit of happiness means man’s right to live for himself, to choose what constitutes his own, private, personal happiness and to work for its achievement. Each individual is the sole and final judge in this choice. A man’s happiness cannot be prescribed to him by another man or by any number of other men.
These rights are the unconditional, personal, private, individual possession of every man, granted to him by the fact of his birth and requiring no other sanction. Such was the conception of the founders of our country, who placed individual rights above any and all collective claims. Society can only be a traffic policeman in the intercourse of men with one another.
From the beginning of history, two antagonists have stood face to face, two opposite types of men: the Active and the Passive. The Active Man is the producer, the creator, the originator, the individualist. His basic need is independence — in order to think and work. He neither needs nor seeks power over other men — nor can he be made to work under any form of compulsion. Every type of good work — from laying bricks to writing a symphony — is done by the Active Man. Degrees of human ability vary, but the basic principle remains the same: the degree of a man’s independence and initiative determines his talent as a worker and his worth as a man.
The Passive Man is found on every level of society, in mansions and in slums, and his identification mark is his dread of independence. He is a parasite who expects to be taken care of by others, who wishes to be given directives, to obey, to submit, to be regulated, to be told. He welcomes collectivism, which eliminates any chance that he might have to think or act on his own initiative.
When a society is based on the needs of the Passive Man it destroys the Active; but when the Active is destroyed, the Passive can no longer be cared for. When a society is based on the needs of the Active Man, he carries the Passive ones along on his energy and raises them as he rises, as the whole society rises. This has been the pattern of all human progress.
Some humanitarians demand a collective state because of their pity for the incompetent or Passive Man. For his sake they wish to harness the Active. But the Active Man cannot function in harness. And once he is destroyed, the destruction of the Passive Man follows automatically. So, if pity is the humanitarians’ first consideration, then in the name of pity, if nothing else, they should leave the Active Man free to function, in order to help the Passive. There is no other way to help him in the long run.
The history of mankind is the history of the struggle between the Active Man and the Passive, between the individual and the collective. The countries which have produced
the happiest men, the highest standards of living and the greatest cultural advances have been the countries where the power of the collective — of the government, of the state — was limited and the individual was given freedom of independent action. As examples: The rise of Rome, with its conception of law based on a citizen’s rights, over the collectivist barbarism of its time. The rise of England, with a system of government based on the Magna Carta, over collectivist, totalitarian Spain. The rise of the United States to a degree of achievement unequaled in history — by grace of the individual freedom and independence which our Constitution gave each citizen against the collective.
While men are still pondering upon the causes of the rise and fall of civilizations, every page of history cries to us that there is but one source of progress: Individual Man in independent action. Collectivism is the ancient principle of savagery. A savage’s whole existence is ruled by the leaders of his tribe. Civilization is the process of setting man free from men.
We are now facing a choice: to go forward or to go back.
Collectivism is not the “New Order of Tomorrow,´´ it is the order of a very dark yesterday. But there is a New Order of Tomorrow. It belongs to Individual Man — the only creator of any tomorrow’s humanity has ever been granted. -- End

If this article speaks to you, then join me on my FB, Author Jeff Scott, page. As I re-release my latest book, Breaking You in the World of I, I offer information about restoring personal power and the true genius that has been dormant in each of us. There is an awakening coming; one the likes that have never been seen.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Honor and Courage

     While watching General Colin Powell be interviewed yesterday, I got to thinking about my past. He spoke about serving in the military with honor. I admittedly had never looked at service to the government/military as something to do with honor. Since one signed up and was paid to perform, I thought it was just a job. When I had joined, I was 18 and really didn't have anything to look forward to in life. I wasn't taught to think about college and I was more of a follower than a leader.
     It was 16 years later that I began changing my life for what I consider, better pastures.  Looking back, I had grown up in a single parent household with absolutely no supervision...none, zero, nada. I was involved in a lot of criminal activity at a very young age, and if there is such a thing as luck, I had an abundance; something or someone was looking over my shoulder. At 15, I should have been killed in a stolen car incident. If it hadn't been a Lincoln Continental with a very long front end, the police told me that I would have been dead. Six months of probation didn't stop me from meddling in things illegal; I never spent one minute in a jail cell and continued to be a manipulative SOB. 
     Divulging all of this information isn't by any means to ease my conscience because, truth be known, I lived the life I did, made it through and have a lot of experience to draw from. This is also not to say that I skated free and clear from any of my actions. What goes around does come around. I have had my car stolen with valuables free for the taking, I have been burglarized. I have seen family members brought down by drugs. Years upon years, I subconsciously punished myself for the crimes I'd committed, but could never truly recognize them...until, I was roughly 34 years of age. One might say, I was awakened.
     Today, I have an abundance of Integrity. I value the experiences I've gone through and recognize exactly why I lied, cheated, stole and manipulated my way through my younger days. I'm actually thankful for the fact that I know exactly where the very first compromising of my integrity began; the impetus for my wandering ways started at 5 years old. If you met me today, you would probably think me to be very honorable because I reach out to assist people in making great changes in their lives. I write books that dig deep into one's psyche and explain why we do the things we do. I coach people in businesses because I understand the freedom self-employment allows. If I hadn't changed myself, I would most likely not be able to help others understand that change can happen instantly; if one wants it enough.
     So what does all of this have to do with honor and courage? Well, when I left the military, it was because I had manipulated my way out. I received a General discharge with other than honorable conditions. My fellow soldiers at the time told me that I would become a bum and that I would never be hired for a job, ever! Three years later I was given a level 1 Secret Clearance by the DOD while working at Hughes. After 3.5 years, I left Hughes to work for myself and never looked back. Still, always in the back of my mind was the military. Here it is 32 years later and I have certain thoughts about our government and what it means to serve, something I was admittedly, at the time, too immature to do. People who say that they don't regret their past actions because they learned from them, well, yes, they do regret them; as I do. I see the young men and women who are laying their lives on the line everyday, and I think of their courage. How scared they must be, yet they do what they have to do, and with honor.
     I regret not having integrity or honor, or even being taught from a young age what it meant to have honor. I have never been in a scenario where I've truly had to be courageous, so I can't say that I am really that brave. I work to understand why the world is still in a perpetual mode of war and believe that intelligence should have ceased all fighting, but also understand that maybe the world isn't ready for peace. I sometimes think that it's not until a family member or friend comes home in a casket, that people really stop to honor the courageous soldiers that face a mountain of adversity each and every day. Though I have my personal regrets, I so appreciate the veterans who move forward to protect what I have often taken for granted, my freedom.
     My hat is off to you, the solders throughout the world that fight for our liberty. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.         

Sunday, October 23, 2011

My Response to Mr. Foster

102 Things NOT To Do If You Hate Taxes

May 18, 2011
So, you’re a Republican that hates taxes? Well, since you do not like taxes or government, please kindly do the following.
1. Do not use Medicare. I don't - (I pay cash if I need a doctor)
2. Do not use Social Security (I won't. I made plans for retirement)
3. Do not become a member of the US military, who are paid with tax dollars. (I served, but wish I didn't)
4. Do not ask the National Guard to help you after a disaster. (I wouldn't expect anyone to help me)
5. Do not call 911 when you get hurt. (I don't put myself in that position)
6. Do not call the police to stop intruders in your home. (That's why I have a gun)
7. Do not summon the fire department to save your burning home. (That's what insurance is for)
8. Do not drive on any paved road, highway, and interstate or drive on any bridge. (Paid my fuel taxes at the pump)
9. Do not use public restrooms. (The same ones from the pump or the public places/businesses I visit?)
10. Do not send your kids to public schools. (You think that comes free?)
11. Do not put your trash out for city garbage collectors. (Pay a company to remove it)
12. Do not live in areas with clean air. (Where the hell is this place?)
13. Do not drink clean water. (Why not? I pay for it.)
14. Do not visit National Parks. (Again, I pay to do so)
15. Do not visit public museums, zoos, and monuments. (The same ones that receive donations?...from me)
16. Do not eat or use FDA inspected food and medicines. (I eat healthy and avoid these)
17. Do not bring your kids to public playgrounds. (I believe that falls under property taxes)
18. Do not walk or run on sidewalks. (I don't. Too many cracks in them)
19. Do not use public recreational facilities such as basketball and tennis courts. (Again --property taxes)
20. Do not seek shelter facilities or food in soup kitchens when you are homeless and hungry. (I would never)
21. Do not apply for educational or job training assistance when you lose your job. (I haven't and wouldn't)
22. Do not apply for food stamps when you can’t feed your children. (Kids are grown and fend for themselves)
23. Do not use the judiciary system for any reason. (I wouldn't if people would stop suing me)
24. Do not ask for an attorney when you are arrested and do not ask for one to be assigned to you by the court. (I have a voice)
25. Do not apply for any Pell Grants. (I won't)
26. Do not use cures that were discovered by labs using federal dollars. (You don't think they're making their money back if I purchased their product?)
27. Do not fly on federally regulated airplanes. (You must believe that the FED makes that plane stay in the air)
28. Do not use any product that can trace its development back to NASA. (Too vague. Show me a list)
29. Do not watch the weather provided by the National Weather Service. (I can step outside to forecast)
30. Do not listen to severe weather warnings from the National Weather Service. (I don't)
31. Do not listen to tsunami, hurricane, or earthquake alert systems. (I pay for my TV to be interrupted, thank you)
32. Do not apply for federal housing. (Don't worry I won't. Have you seen who your neighbor might be?)
33. Do not use the internet, which was developed by the military. Developed yes, but again, I pay for the privilege)
34. Do not swim in clean rivers. (I don't)
35. Do not allow your child to eat school lunches or breakfasts. (I don't. I made their lunch everyday)
36. Do not ask for FEMA assistance when everything you own gets wiped out by disaster. (One of the worst run orgs anywhere)
37. Do not ask the military to defend your life and home in the event of a foreign invasion. (Again, that's why I bear right)
38. Do not use your cell phone or home telephone. (Again, pay for this...hello?)
39. Do not buy firearms that wouldn’t have been developed without the support of the US Government and military. That includes most of them. (Firearms were dev. long before the our military sported them)
40. Do not eat USDA inspected produce and meat. (Redundant to #16)
41. Do not apply for government grants to start your own business. (How are they granting money when they're broke?)
42. Do not apply to win a government contract. (The masses don't do this)
43. Do not buy any vehicle that has been inspected by government safety agencies. (Where do they get their funds? Fuel taxes perhaps?)
44. Do not buy any product that is protected from poisons, toxins, etc…by the Consumer Protection Agency. (The way Tylenol was protected but an idiot put cyanide in?) (Goes back to paying for products beyond what they cost to make)
45. Do not save your money in a bank that is FDIC insured. (Who the hell has savings? lol)
46. Do not use Veterans benefits or military health care. I don't and won't...again, I pay cash)
47. Do not use the G.I. Bill to go to college. (haven't, won't)
48. Do not apply for unemployment benefits. (Companies pay for this)
49. Do not use any electricity from companies regulated by the Department of Energy. (Aren't they all, and don't we pay anyway?)
50. Do not live in homes that are built to code. (Again...taxes have covered this)
51. Do not run for public office. Politicians are paid with taxpayer dollars. (have you seen the politicians...I don't want the rep :)  )
52. Do not ask for help from the FBI, S.W.A.T, the bomb squad, Homeland Security, State troopers, etc… (You make it seem like they're always the "Good guy")
53. Do not apply for any government job whatsoever as all state and federal employees are paid with tax dollars. (Wouldn't)
54. Do not use public libraries. (I buy my books)
55. Do not use the US Postal Service. (You've got mail.)
56. Do not visit the National Archives. (Haven't been to one. Not really interested)
57. Do not visit Presidential Libraries. (Did you mean, The liars library?)
58. Do not use airports that are secured by the federal government. (It's kind of hard not to when they have you cuffed)
59. Do not apply for loans from any bank that is FDIC insured. (Banking fees all cover something)
60. Do not ask the government to help you clean up after a tornado. (Okay, I won't ask)
61. Do not ask the Department of Agriculture to provide a subsidy to help you run your farm. (farm? Are you serious?)
62. Do not take walks in National Forests. (You must pay for's not free to begin $ or not)
63. Do not ask for taxpayer dollars for your oil company. (WTF?) (Doesn't concern the masses)
64. Do not ask the federal government to bail your company out during recessions. (The way they did the solar companies...that was good use of tax $$)
65. Do not seek medical care from places that use federal dollars. (No plans)
66. Do not use Medicaid. (No. I won't. I have plans)
67. Do not use WIC. (Won't)
68. Do not use electricity generated by Hoover Dam. (Again, paid for each month)
69. Do not use electricity or any service provided by the Tennessee Valley Authority. (Them damn Tennessee'ans)
70. Do not ask the Army Corps of Engineers to rebuild levees when they break. (Move or buy a boat)
71. Do not let the Coast Guard save you from drowning when your boat capsizes at sea. (Really?)
72. Do not ask the government to help evacuate you when all hell breaks loose in the country you are in. (I stay out of the Mid-East)
73. Do not visit historic landmarks. (Can I use my binocs?)
74. Do not visit fisheries. (No problem, I won't) (Did you know fish are being fed grain now? Thanks Gov.)
75. Do not expect to see animals that are federally protected because of the Endangered Species List. (I can see them in a book)
76. Do not expect plows to clear roads of snow and ice so your kids can go to school and so you can get to work.
77. Do not hunt or camp on federal land. (Newsflash, all land is Federal if they want it to be)
78. Do not work anywhere that has a safe workplace because of government regulations. (You mean like the safest place around, the Post Office?)
79. Do not use public transportation. (Paid for)
80. Do not drink water from public water fountains. (Property taxes)
81. Do not whine when someone copies your work and sells it as their own. Government enforces copyright laws. (They don't do a very good job)
82. Do not expect to own your home, car, or boat. Government organizes and keeps all titles. (That's why America is FREE. lol They already own it, but loan it back to you)
83. Do not expect convicted felons to remain off the streets. (As if they're off the street now)
84. Do not eat in restaurants that are regulated by food quality and safety standards. (paid for it)
85. Do not seek help from the US Embassy if you need assistance in a foreign nation. (Don't do stupid things in foreign lands)
86. Do not apply for a passport to travel outside of the United States. (paid for out of pocket)
87. Do not apply for a patent when you invent something. (Again, money out of pocket)
88. Do not adopt a child through your local, state, or federal governments. (Who needs the expense?)
89.Do not use elevators that have been inspected by federal or state safety regulators. (How long does a company stay in business that kills its clients?)
90. Do not use any resource that was discovered by the USGS. (Too vague)
91. Do not ask for energy assistance from the government. (I won't)
92. Do not move to any other developed nation, because the taxes are much higher. (Thanks for the heads-up)
93. Do not go to a beach that is kept clean by the state.
94. Do not use money printed by the US Treasury.
95. Do not complain when millions more illegal immigrants cross the border because there are no more border patrol agents.
96. Do not attend a state university. (Hello? Out of pocket... again!)
97. Do not see any doctor that is licensed through the state. (He paid his fees and I pay his)
98. Do not use any water from municipal water systems. (As though water is free. I get a bill.)
99. Do not complain when diseases and viruses, that were once fought around the globe by the US government and CDC, reach your house. (If they reach my house, then they reached the CDC's also)
100. Do not work for any company that is required to pay its workers a livable wage, provide them sick days, vacation days, and benefits. (I don't and I won't)
101. Do not expect to be able to vote on election days. Government provides voting booths, election day officials, and voting machines which are paid for with taxes. (Well maybe they should stop, we all know there's a puppet master anyway. lol)
102. Do not ride trains. The railroad was built with government financial assistance. (That abused the Chinese workers. Hello pot, this is're black)
The fact is, we pay for the lifestyle we expect. Without taxes, our lifestyles would be totally different and much harder. America would be a third world country. The less we pay, the less we get in return. Americans pay less taxes today since 1958 and is ranked 32nd out of 34 of the top tax paying countries. Chile and Mexico are 33rd and 34th. The Republicans are lying when they say that we pay the highest taxes in the world and are only attacking taxes to reward corporations and the wealthy and to weaken our infrastructure and way of life. So next time you object to paying taxes or fight to abolish taxes for corporations and the wealthy, keep this quote in mind…
“I like to pay taxes. With them, I buy civilization.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

     My thoughts - I have answered each of the questions, but the actual writer should know that most Republicans don't object to all taxes. Of course, taxes help our country, but so would the billions of tax dollars that politicians give away to other countries. How many bridges and roads could be repaired with the $30 million we gave to "3rd" world countries? How many jobs would be created by those same tax dollars that go overseas? Fix the house before you worry about the lawn.

Income taxes were started to fund the wars that helped to settle this great country. When the wars ended, so too, did the taxes. It wasn't until the FED came into play with the robber-barons that taxes on income were converted from corps to the individual...why do you think the FED has their hand in everything. It's not to keep order, but to keep control.

If a worker could keep the $50 that comes out for income tax each week, then maybe they could buy the shoes for their kids. For the worker that pays $100 per week, perhaps he could put others to work by purchasing a car. Income taxes keep people poor...that and bad money management.  

Monday, July 11, 2011

The World is Changing; Are Your Kids Ready?

Over the past few weeks I've had quite a few discussions regarding the youth of today and the differences of generation. The conversations haven't just been with people of my era, but mainly comprised of young adults that are somewhat confused as to where they truly belong in society. When I explain what happened to them, they seem to present a "deer in the headlight" gleam in their eyes. Then I ask the question, how much time do you spend  introspectively; thinking about your personal life and how you've gotten where you are today?

The answer is usually non-existent or the respondent is lost in wonder and confused as to what my question really means. Was I speaking a foreign language...NO! The younger generation often believe they are working toward something, but they're not sure exactly what that "something" is. Many believe that they are supposed to go to college and get a good job, but it takes sooooo long to get a degree and Waa! Waa! Waa!

There are changes taking place and the American youth hasn't the drive to succeed. When I explained that my generation was taught to win, and that their generation was taught to be submissive, that no one wins, well, now they are really at a loss. They don't understand how this pertains to their life. The greatest changes that are taking place right now, this very moment, and that will continue over the next 50 years, are in science and technology. And where are our children? They are the end user.

Well how is this bad? The developer makes the money, the user spends the money. The developer needs the minds to develop products that the end user will purchase. The developer will pay good money for bright minds to THINK, to CREATE, to EXPLORE beyond the norm. The developers of the future need scientists, not a Jersey Shore want-to-be. The American children don't know their place in the world because they've had helicopter parents hovering over them and stripping them of what I call an I AM status.

Stripping our children? Yes! My kids are 22 and 19 years of age. They both pay for; their rent, cell phone, car, insurance, fuel, food and any clothing or entertainment, and their education. Am I a Tiger dad? No!  There are no free rides for my children, and later in life, when some of their peers look to their parents for a handout, mine will know how to survive on their own. When I talk about stripping children of their I AM status, what I'm saying is that American parents have been telling their children what to do or not to do since they first ejected from the birth canal. Generation Y has never had to think or strive to achieve anything on their own. So what happens?

What you're seeing in America today is the results of 20+ years of intelligence being dumb down. Instead of raising our children as the geniuses they could be, we have agreed to believe that things just happen and we have no control over anything. Isn't that what the kids were basically taught when the idea that "nobody wins" was inserted into sports? Twenty something years later you have kids who fail out of their freshman year of science and refuse to give it a second shot. It's as though in their minds, their failure is a permanent fixture that they could never rise above. Where is the real problem?

The real problem is that children of the day are running around with a sub-conscious that says, "I don't have to do that. I don't have to step up my game. I don't have to win." Hence, America is not even near the top ten of education in the world. As a matter of fact, we import through the H1B, all of our scientists. What?

The H1B is an immigration document that allows the U.S. to bring over students from other countries and allow them to stay permanently because they become scientists. How can this be? Why are there so many kids from other countries becoming scientists so easily, and little Johnny USA can't pass his basic college classes? Because these kids in other countries are taught to win. They compete with each other in education because they "don't have" some cases...indoor plumbing, paved roads, iPods, heated classrooms, grass fields to play on, a mini-van with DVD players (for each kid), HD televisions and so many other material goods to take away their attention and dumb them down. These kids from other countries--- read books...and enjoy it. They can compete in education so they can have what our children take for granted.

This is not to say that every American kid has it so easy that they don't have to work at making ends meet. There are many with great desires and do have the winning attitude needed to be successful in life. They don't have parents rushing out to purchase the latest video game that allow them to sit in front of the TV for hours on end. Yes, there are some that actually read good books that allow their young minds to be introspective. But, very few!

I hate to generalize, but what I am learning through conversations with the youthful adults is, they don't want to plan anything. They want to just go with the flow. "We'll get there when we get there." The question is; where's there? Will they even know if "there" will be?

So what is this blog really about? Is it just a rant and rave that parents have screwed the future? No, not at all. What it is supposed to do is help people to wake up. There is an urgency to what is happening in the world and especially to our country; America. This coming August 2nd America will be in the threshold of bankruptcy. If the government doesn't raise the debt ceiling, it will default on loans acquired from other countries. This in turn sends a message to the world that we are not the powerful nation we, or everyone else, thought we were. There will be many middle easterners around the world who will feel victory and be more than happy to laugh in our face.

The future of our country and our children is at stake and the kids could care less. They have no jobs, they live at home and they just know their parents will accept all of the burden; because they always have. Go have a one on one with your kids. If you taught them that no one wins, then admit that it was the wrong message. Admit that you may have stripped them of a lot of their intelligence by not letting them accept responsibility for their lives. Begin teaching them that there is a future that can be bright, if they are willing to work hard, even though sometimes stumbling, they must learn to get back up.

The world is changing and capitalism is moving away from America. Will you or your child be able to move along with it? Ask them what they're going to do with their lives. Push them out of the proverbial nest. Make them fly. Get them out of their comfort zone as quickly as possible. Want to find where your adult child stands? See if this tells you anything...when Johnny or Mary comes home this evening, tell him that like the rest of the country, you're going belly up through fiscal irresponsibility and will have to move in the next 30 days. Then, ask them what they're going to do, where they're going to live. See how they're going to make it in the real world. Find out if there is a PLAN or if they know where "there" is.

If they become nervous at all, don't give up the game, but make sure to have the talk about what they are doing with their life. They need to have a direction and they need it now.


Saturday, July 2, 2011

A Night to Remember - 4th of July

     Every year at this time families and friends gather together to celebrate the 4th of July, Independence Day. This is the day of recognition that our country, it's brave soldiers, offered their lives in order to live free from tyranny. At this moment, I'm not talking about he soldiers who are fighting in the middle east, but more so, the founding soldiers that lay their weak and dieing bodies at the foot of the pole that held the U.S. flag in place. As many cannon balls passed through the night air to injure our soldiers, they too, ripped through the American flag.
     As the night wore on and more soldiers died, the pole that held our flag was heavily damaged. There came a point that if the flag were to touch the ground, it would surely mean victory to England. Riddled with shrapnel and other sharp fragments in their bodies, soldiers one by one, who knew they were about to die, walked out to the flagpole and lay at its base. As more soldiers were dieing, the base grew larger and larger; at all costs, the flag would not fall.
     Today, the reason the flag is not allowed to touch the ground when being removed from its post, is in direct relation to those soldiers who died to make sure we as a country would survive.
     I remember a point in my life, the age of 12, when I stopped buying fireworks and decided to start watching the fireworks. Each year, as I see the bursts of bright lights in celebration, I stop for a moment and thank those soldiers long gone. With each loud bang I'm instantly taken to the moment that the battle raged around them and their brothers in arms were giving everything they had, which meant, their very last breath and final beat of their heart.
     Were they to be alive today, I often wonder if those soldiers would feel regret and shame of the country and its position of the day. I don't like to be the nay-sayer, but our flag is falling because, as my last post suggests, we forgot what it means to want to win, to be free. 
     So when you see those bombs bursting in air, stop for a moment to think about that very night and the single pole with dieing American men who believed they could win, at all cost...their very lives.
     If you get the chance, and you are spending the holidays with friends and family, adults and children, then take a moment to share with them what took place that night and ask them what it means to them to be an American.     

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Where does America END?

     As I read through the News this morning I am flabbergasted by all of the hand-outs or the idea that this country, the good ol' U.S.A., can dig any further into debt. Where does fiscal responsibility start?
     We all know that everything in life has a beginning, middle and an end, or a start, change and stop. If you didn't know this...whoops, my bad! (And yes, there is no Easter bunny or Satan Clause) lol. America had a rough start, changed quite a bit over the past two centuries, and as it looks now, will be coming to an abrupt end if things don't change drastically.
     This morning in particular I see that HUD has a billion dollars to give away in $50k increments to people who are behind on their home loans. To top it off, the people who receive the money may not have to pay any of it back if they stay in the home for another five years. When does it end?
     I don't necessarily want people to become homeless, but really, is it fair to those who are working and making payments on property that is upside down? What ever happen to pulling one's self up by the boot straps? If you lose your house, you make due; you regroup and build yourself back up. What happens when the people who take the $50k to repay their late loans eventually default again because they're out of work? So, what happens, the bank has received past payments, a boatload/influx of taxpayer money and still takes back the house. I'm telling ya, when I grow up, I want to be a Bank!
     This morning there are suggestions of raising the country's debt ceiling. Well hey, instead of raising the availability of cash that doesn't exist, how about if we stop giving away cash to other countries that have screwed us for years? Why don't we take Kadafi out (and I don't mean to dinner) and take all of his oil? If we're going to raid a country or overthrow a dictator, then let's be in-humane about it. Why cut his throat and then dress him up nice? Americans are footing the bill for too many issues, and it will, at some point, have to end; whether we want it to or not.
     Other country leaders are already looking for the monetary system that can replace the U.S. dollar. Yes, leaders are having meetings and not inviting the U.S.. The only reason we're still the leader of the free world is because of our ability to create money. The U.S. dollar is what all monies are measured against, but not for long. Again, everything has a start, change and stop, a beginning, middle and an end. Rome fell, the wall in Germany came down, North and South Korea are hashing it out. If you don't think the U.S. can fall, well, I have some beach front property in the Everglades for sale...CHEAP!
     I don't want to give up on America, but with the direction our leaders have taken us, what other alternatives are there? They took the straps off the boots! We're expected to continue paying taxes to a system that is run like the SS of Nazi Germany; not at all in favor of the citizens of this country. One has to ask, "Is this all for naught?" "Is it really the end?" "There has to be a turning point, doesn't there?"
     In his book, Down the Drain, available at  Vince Mancino talks about how our government does everything it can for other countries, while we work our asses off just to get by. Anyone heard of the Federal government not allowing Arizona to handle an "illegal" alien problem? We're throwing hundreds of billions of dollars to others who hate us, instead of paying it into our debt. Doesn't this piss you off? Your government is not supporting you, the person that pay the bills through your tax dollars, but instead, basically spits in your face the way many middle easterners would if you walked down their streets. They like your money, they just don't like you.
     Where did the beginning of the end all start? It started with a misconception of what winning is all about. When soccer started in this country the message was, everyone gets to play, no matter how good you one is allowed to sit out for most of the game. Then the idea rolled over into baseball, the new declaration (started 20+ years ago) was that, "nobody wins or loses, we're just here to play." So, young children the ages of five and six have this idea drummed into their brain, into their subconscious, that no one ever wins or loses, and that they're just here to play a game. They grow up and have little care about winning or losing, they're just here, nothing really matters. Twenty years later, you see it in the workforce; kids that don't care, it doesn't really matter, I can live at home with mom and dad if I don't like my job, they'll take care of goes on and builds. Sure, there will be some kids that rise to leadership roles, but I would wager good money (not U.S. currency) that they were brought up the old fashion, boot strappin' way; by parents that taught them to WIN.
     A Junkie has to hit rock bottom before they can even consider making a change. Our politicians, like the Junkie, obviously have glazed over eyes that won't allow them to see reality or understand that they're heading straight for a cliff (the end). What is your backup plan? Like a real Junkie who steals for his next high, the politicians are stealing from you, the taxpayer, not for their high, but so they don't have to confront their high.

Hmm, maybe we just need to go back to the ballpark and remember why it's called a we have a target to aim for, so we can WIN.

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Monday, June 20, 2011

Diets of a Caveman

Diet of a Caveman, does that sound interesting? It would probably make for a great title of a book, if it isn't one already. Hmm, maybe one day I will write it. Actually, since I am an author, but also a ghostwriter, then maybe someone will pay me to write it for them. Recently, a Facebook friend, Nayri Hannah, posted a link on her page regarding healthy eating habits. If you visit her website, you will find some great information on health and fitness.

So, back to the story. After Nayri had posted a link on FB, I followed it and read the information. Though I won't go into all of the details right here, I read some things that I'd heard long ago, and my memory was refreshed. Could I start this new regimen and be successful? Of course I could! I just completed writing a book titled, Breaking You in the World of I, and regaining control of one's I AM status is what the book is all about.  It's not food that needs to change, but how I choose the foods I use to sustain a healthy life.

What I didn't put into in my book, is about eating habits that most of society has become so relaxed about and how important eating the right foods are, not only to one's health, but also their ability to think and act.

So, after reading the article I began recalling the information and how effective it would be. Okay, so it's time to make a commitment. I know I don't feel as energetic as I used to and I know that all energy must start from within. It's time to make use of a good, solid plan of nutrition. It's time to quit playing games and stop making excuses as to why I can't make this change permanent. In the article, I learned that for economical reasons, the producers of food use corn and two other ingredients that help to keep society unhealthy. It's not that these producers of food want you to be unhealthy, but they do want to make as much money as possible...if that means taking short-cuts that put you at risk, oh well.

My new plan of action as the article suggests is to eat foods that are made up of one ingredient, things like; vegetables, fruits, meat, nuts and fish. get it? Basically what a caveman would eat. Have you ever seen a caveman in the movies that wasn't shredded? Okay, I know those are only movies and that real cavemen struggled to keep healthy, but you don't have to. There are so many sources for good one ingredient foods that it boggles the mind as to why someone hasn't started the caveman grocery store.  

My objective is to retrain my brain how and what to eat. I do like fruit, but have often chose pretzels. I do like fish, but it's so easy to buy a burger. Well, the new frame of mind is to...listen close because this is important...tell myself how much I like my new choice of "good for me foods" and how much I dislike the "bad for me foods." Did you know that the more you tell yourself how much you like something, your brain will rewire itself to accept that new truth and then run with it until you decide another change? Eventually, you really won't miss the soda, the candy, the quick burgers. After each good meal, be sure to give yourself an "attaboy" because when you do, you begin the neurological change back to a system that you were meant to use from the beginning of your birth, au-natural; the natural state of existence.

One of the things the article mentioned was that when you purchase eggs, they should have been hatched by free roaming chicken, not one's caught up in a cage and fed corn. When it comes to meat, you should purchase meat from cattle that was allowed to graze on grass, again, not corn-fed. Did you know that fish are now being fed corn? That means that even fish won't be a healthy meal. What are you going to do?

Keep coming back to this blog because over the next few months I'll not only tell and show you what I'm doing to create a change in my eating, but where I'm actually going to get my food. You will be shocked, trust me.

This is the link to the article:

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Are you accountable for your actions?

Are you accountable for your actions? Sometimes, I have to ask myself this very question. Then, as I stop to ponder my thoughts, I realize that I need to delve deeper into the definition of the whole question; accountable for your (my) actions? What are the actions? Apparently, as I think about it, our actions are not just what we do, but it is also what we say we are going to do. Have you ever told someone that you were going to do something, but then you didn't do it? You know; make a call, send something in the mail, check something out or relay information to another. There are many examples, but these will suffice.

Why is it so easy to drop the verbal actions? Because they're invisible. People can't see you do them, and unless the other party, the recipient of your non-action, complains to everyone the two of you know, then usually you're off the hook. Or, you think you're off the hook, but that's really not true.

When we continue to offer something and then not follow through, we begin to set up a pattern. We make it easier to become more, and then completely, unreliable. The more often we disregard our promises (yes, verbally telling someone you will do something is as strong as a promise) the weaker our integrity, and eventually, the less we can expect to be productive for ourselves. It's kind of like the road to run out of people to disregard so you start disregarding your self. You tell your self that you're going to do this and do that, but you never seem to get around to it. Hmm! Is there a correlation?

Who's next? Your boss, clients, co-workers, parents, children, pets? Can it get to the point where man's best friend doesn't even trust your words? What about the gold fish floating at the top of the bowl? How much worse can it get? Perhaps it can get as bad as no one wanting to be around you, or when you speak, the first thing people think in their head is, "yeah, let me hold my breath while I wait for you to do anything."

If we could read minds, the thoughts of our friends, what would they really be saying to us? How does one make a comeback from a string of empty actions/promises? Well, the first thing to do, is to be true to one's self. Admit that one has dropped the ball but needs to pick it up and get back in the game. Start a recovery process; with each non-action you've taken, apologize with the next action and admit that you're working on being more reliable. It really is not that difficult to tell someone you'll be somewhere at a certain time, but as life happens, plans are sometimes thwarted. If this should happen, don't forget that your integrity is on the line; make the call to let the person know you're running late or why you won't make it. It only takes a moment and the other party can at least go about their business. Sometimes, this is also called, being respectful.

If you've ever uttered the words, "life is difficult," rest assured, you're doing something that is a contradiction to the self, but that's a blog for another day.

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Monday, June 6, 2011

Are we Genius?

I know, by many conversations I've had lately, that very few people believe that they are actually of genius status. Often times, they save the word, genius, for people such as Leonardo Da Vinci, Albert Einstein or Nikolai Tesla. These are just three people who have done very extraordinary work in their fields. Though Leonardo, if I may call him by first name, was an incredible painter and an observer of life, what did he do that made people consider him a genius?

Leonardo, the intellect, the artist, the observer, the genius, helped mankind by just being who he was and taking the time to not only smell the roses, but to investigate what made a rose, a rose. The only reason I declare that Leonardo was a genius is because he took the time to delve into life at more than just a glance. Because he took the time to understand the mechanics of movement; he built war machines for the authority of the day. Because Leonardo took the time to be curious, he took the steps necessary to understand the human body and how it functions. Though science has taken us further than Leonardo ever could (because of technology), he laid much of the groundwork by cutting on cadavers and drawing out our muscular skeletal system. By having a well drawn out "schematic" of the human body, this allowed medicine to make great advances. Really? A genius?

Nikolai Tesla, to me, was a genius beyond the word genius. He was on a realm all his own. He may have been college educated, but the advances he made in science and the use of electricity, has gone far beyond what any college professor could have imagined, or have ever taught. Tesla even gave Edison a run for his money, and I dare to say, the only thing Edison had over Tesla was a greedy attitude and an ego that couldn't handle the likes of Tesla's natural ability. Really? Natural?

Albert Einstein was a lousy student. He, like many of the youth in his time, didn't know what he would do for work or what he would become. In his earlier working days, Albert was a patent clerk. You know, someone who did research on patents and whether they were original, or if a patent had already been issued. When it came to Albert's education, he wasn't a great student. As a matter of fact, he failed miserably at math. Yeah, all of that E=MC2 stuff...he couldn't understand...hmmm, maybe because it wasn't available for him to understand...he was the originator. Really? A failure?

As I stated in my most recent book, Breaking You in the World of I, everyone that has ever been born, has been of a genius status. Like these three men mentioned in this blog, at birth, and all through your life, you have a slate that can be drawn upon at a moments notice. Leonardo carried what were in his day, writing tablets: he drew or wrote down all of his thoughts so he could ponder and make sense of the life around him. Mr. Tesla was known to be walking and if a thought sparked in his brain, he would draw it out in a small field of dirt. Albert, good ol' Mr. E, as I like to call him, did exactly what everyone who has ever been considered a genius in their field, does. He took notes and studied day into night; his thoughts.

One may think that these men may have had very boring lives because all they did was to think about their particular field. Well, that, my friend, is where genius happen. Albert Einstein believed that everyone was a genius and he was correct in that assumption. These men only stand out as larger than life because they not only had tenacity, they had a desire to understand why things work...they were all very curious.

Curiosity is what makes human beings more of a genius than they have ever been taught. Are you living up to your original status? The genius status you were born with, but was eventually, unknowingly stripped from you;well, it's still there...waiting for you to turn on the light to your natural abilities. As Leonardo pointed out, you are more than the sum of your parts. Calm your nerves and accept your genius status, it's really there and always has been... you've actually been waiting for yourself to be curious.     

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

My Harley

When I go back to yesteryear, as a boy, I recall always wanting a big dog; a Rotweiller. Surely, a dog like a Rotty would say something about it's owner, me; a trustworthy kind that looks the part of danger, but if you get to know it, you'd find a great demeanor. Rotts are known to protect what is theirs and are good with kids. They like to be around their master and unlike the Pitbull's history, they are good with people and other dogs as long as you don't jerk them around...yep, sounds just like me (except for the master part).

Well, for years and years I'd been adamant about not having a dog unless it was a Rott, and I had a place where it could run freely. Always living in an apartment had kind of put a damper on ever really raising one from puppy-hood, not to mention, living in cramped quarters with a big dog, to me, would not be a good experience.

So what should one replace the idea of a big dog with? I know, a Harley. It's my belief that every guy should have a Harley. Having one, as I have found, can relieve any stress one might be feeling. My Harley is always there and ready to go. Even more interesting is the introspection I got after getting my Harley. When I took it out on the road, I didn't care if anyone thought anything about me or looked at me like I this way or that. I was now someone who had a Harley that I could care for and take wherever I wanted. As a matter of fact, with my Harley, I now have women stopping to talk with me like never before. Amazing what a Harley can do for you, suddenly, I'm approachable.

When I first heard about my Harley, I didn't want to hear about it. I didn't want to take care of it. I didn't need one. It would just cost me more money. I'm too busy to have a Harley, you can't just let them sit. They need to be out on the road, running. Well, my girlfriend got a call from a friend, and after being adamant for a week that I didn't want it, she broke me down and we got my new Harley. I took me about 5 minutes to accept that we now had it. I love it! I wouldn't take it back if I could. I learned that my Harley had been through a lot, and now, after two months of having it, I don't know that I could ever get rid of it. Scratch that! I wouldn't get rid of it.

Harley is a Bishon/Poodle mix of some kind. He was tied to a post somewhere in Buena Park and taken in by a kind woman. A friend of Mary's (my GF) thought it would be perfect for her and sent a picture text. Well, I knew Mary was going to get this dog one way or another, and as I said, within 5 minutes the dog had my heart and soul. Is it a big Rotty? No. Do I still want a big Rott? Yes. Will not having a big dog make me any different than I am today? No. A dog doesn't make you who you are or really represent anything about you. People would like to think that dogs are representin', but that's just a perception that's full of poop.

If you haven't figured it out by now, his name is "Harley" and he's a rescue pet. If you have ever wanted a pet, look in a shelter today, adopt one and I guarantee that you'll learn more about yourself than you ever thought possible.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Personalizing Other People's Problems

   Have you ever taken on someone's faults as your own? Really! I'm serious. Have you ever gotten caught up in someone's dilemma and you found that you were feeling stressed? This happens for a lot of CPAs during tax time, but it also happens, often times, in our relationships with friends and family.
   Have you ever been pulled into an argument between two other friends? It sucks! Both wanting you to side with them is a catastrophe waiting to happen. There are many recognizable situations that happen on a daily basis to send us over the proverbial edge when it comes to other people's problems, but why? The why is PERSONALIZATION.
   We often times connect to a present situation by being triggered from a situation in our past. In my new book, Breaking You in the World of I (due out June '11), I make it a point to the reader that anytime someone is angry or yelling about anything, then they are the one with a problem and not you. What I find is, many people take it personal when someone is angry or yelling at them. Why?
   Whenever someone is angry and yelling, it is 100% because they have been triggered by a situation that resembles a situation from their past. People don't get angry and yell if they don't have information from which to draw. As a short example: a man gets angry at his child for bringing home bad grades on his report card. If the man takes the time to view his emotional outburst (what triggered it), he will see; he has been triggered by his own past of failing. There is always a similar situation that can be recognized from one's past.
   Well, what should you do if you're the recipient of the anger or yelling? First off, there are two things to clarify. One is to just know that they have been triggered and since you are the one in the line of fire, then you are related to the triggering. Don't take it couldn't have known about their past. But, and this is a BIG BUT, now you know the trigger/button and you can push it at will. I don't suggest you do that!
   Second, do not personalize their anger as your fault. Sure, you may have helped with the trigger, but if that person doing the yelling had handled the situation when it first took place, in their past, they wouldn't have a trigger on that subject. Get it?
   Now, here we go. You triggered them and they are yelling in anger at you. Whatever emotion you start to display or feel, is now your chance to find what triggers you and what you haven't handled from your past. This is where we all get to play grown up and declare a TIME OUT.
   If you find that you can't handle being yelled at, then you need to start making better clarifications in regards to your daily living. Ask yourself why you can't stand it. Was there a lot of yelling in the house when you were a kid? How did you react back then? Were you assertive or did you back down? What emotion did you experience when someone yelled? Did you want to shy away? Do the research on how you handled your past and compare it to how you handle the present.
   The personalization of other people's problems is not the issue; you are not them. As a matter of fact, you can't personalize someone's problems, it's virtually impossible. You are personalizing your past problems and bringing them to the surface. It's at this time that you should always take a moment to reflect on what just happened and measure it to how you handled situations from your past. When you can begin to do that and make it a part of your "personal" healing, weight will be lifted from your shoulders and you will have a skip in your step.
   Is there a family member you are estranged from? Do you avoid Christmas with the family? Is there an unsettled dispute from years ago? When you want to get that skip back into your step, realize that things change and it's okay to let go of past personalization, that people will do what they do or have done and what they find fault with has absolutely nothing to do with you. It never has and it never will!

Monday, May 9, 2011

Monday Arggg! Business as Usual?

   I guess I'm a lucky man. While many of my friends are fighting the Monday morning traffic, I spend time with my girlfriend and walking the dog. We don't have to rush anywhere or wonder if we're encroaching on someone's lane (if you live in a city like L.A., then you know what I'm talking about).
   What does your Monday morning look like? Are you rushing to beat the clock? If so, why? Do you know that most traffic accidents are because someone thought they were going to be late, so they had to rush through that light. I have so many friends that have gotten needless tickets, costing them their whole day's wages, all for the idea that they shouldn't be late.
   Business as usual in this day in age, should be anything but! How will you create your Monday? For that matter, how about Tuesday, Wednesday or any other day of the week? What game will you decide to play? Will you procrastinate? Will you be casual? Will you be on top of your game and drive hard to beat any and all quotas? If you're a manager/supervisor how will you handle your staff?
     If you can see the pattern here, there are a lot of things to think about when starting off the week in business. Whether you're the owner or the employee, you should have a plan of action, and not a regret for having to show up. Some of the happiest people I know are those who have a plan of action and a go-getter attitude; even when they're the lower level employee. There are people that meet their daily job with a passion and a self respect that says, "I'm going to make this happen and it's going to be great!"
   If you've ever caught yourself saying, "Oh man, I hate Mondays!" Then you may need to rethink what you hate. If Monday was a birthday, or a holiday that you were off, you probably wouldn't hate it, would you? How you think, is how you speak, and when you make a declaration of hate for anything, it's an opportunity to see what's buried in your sub-conscious.
   Business as usual is when we don't take the time to recognize our true ability in life; the ability to power through or make significant gains in anything we desire. Whoa! Key word...Desire. Do you have a desire? Of course, we all have a desire for something, but can you have a desire for your company to do better? Can you show up and desire to make the day so perfect that you clock out knowing that you were at your ultimate best? Of course you can. Life is yours for the making.
   Will your day be business as usual? If so, why? Is your as usual? Interesting, I've never heard  a person with a lot of drive, one that meets each day like a tiger ready to pounce on its prey, say those words, "Business as usual." They don't think that way, so they don't speak that way. Because they don't speak that way, they don't act that way. Because they don't act that way, they don't live that way. Because they don't live that way, Monday is never the enemy.
   What will you decide to do concerning your week of work? Hopefully after reading this, you will make a game of your career and create a plan of action for not only you, but others in your office. Really, find someone to compete with or make teams and create a game. Whoever/whichever person/team wins, gets lunch or whatever the agreed upon prize.
   Get on the phone, knock on more doors, network more often, talk talk talk and create an unusual game of business. Limit the time on the social sites that keep you from engaging worthy business contacts or streamlining your business to be more profitable. Create a slogan that gets posted on your computer screen or your cell phone that quickly reminds you that your life should not be a "usual" run of the mill happenstance.
Think it! Speak it! Be it! 


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Friendships; Hardships, Isolation and Resolve

Friendships, often times, come and go. We never know who will stay around for the duration of our lives or who will be discarded by choice. If there is anything certain about friendships, it is that they will occasionally endure hardships.
What are your friends like? Do they reflect your morals, your values, your personality? Has a friend ever let you down, or likewise, have you unwittingly passed judgment incorrectly upon them?
When times get tough between friends, isolation or complete disconnection can be advisable for a short time; a cooling off period. We all need our space after a conflict, but that conflict is often times a message to ourselves that we need to look within, observe our own faults.
In a forthcoming book, Breaking You in the World of I, readers will discover that when they have a problem with someone in their life, the problem always stems from within. In other words, one may think that the friend did something really wrong, but introspection will always reveal that the wrong was planted like a tree from years long ago; during our youth.
People, friends, will always be exactly who they are. When we get angry or spout off our thoughts regarding that friend, we're really spewing our anger about ourselves and the inability to handle a situation outside of ourselves. We tend to believe that our way is always the right way, and until called to the mat, we may not even recognize ourselves as being out of order.
If one is ever having a problem with a friend, isolate yourself for a day or two and think things through. When we are angry, what we're admitting is that we've been triggered. We're re-living something from our past, perhaps from our youth. During any squabbles with a friend, the key to resolution is to not speak about your problem with other friends, who are then forced to listen, and often times, required to take sides.
Gossiping about the difference of opinions or verbally defaming a friend is an act of attrition in respect of the self. It shows a complete lack of integrity and willfully harms all participants involved.
Any dispute can be resolved, even if so simply as to agree to disagree. Searching out and thoroughly inspecting one's triggers to any argument or defamatory accusations are the absolute key to a prosperous resolve.